The Move to Michigan - Flirting with Fire
In 2011 we were in Denver, Colorado planting what would be the beginning stages of our church. We had a small group of passionate people meeting in a movie theater and a home. I was young, dumb, and broke; thought I knew EVERYTHING. 26 years old and thought I had to prove it all to everyone.
Later I would realize I was wearing a mask the whole time and broken inside.
I had went through the whole process of a church planting network and I was excited. Excited to build something. Excited about a future church that would grow on the east side of I-25 in North Denver. I envision thousands of people coming to worship. I had great intentions, but deep down God knew that wasn’t going to happen. Not the way I envisioned it. Nope.
Now it’s comical. Then…nothing but.
Fast forward to 2014; Les and I began talking about having a baby. We were struggling to have one. In fact, we had went to an OBGYN to hear she was never going to have any. But when God planted chriropractic in our steps, we gave it a shot. It wasn’t long after several visits, her cycle came back (she had PCOS). If you know, that’s a good sign when you’re trying to get pregnant.
TIme past and the discussion came on the table to relocate to my wife’s hometown in Traverse City, Michigan. I had never been. Quite frankly, I was comfortable and I loved Colorado. I didn’t want to move, but I wanted her to be happy and I understood what she wanted. If there was any possibility having a baby, she wanted to have one in a familiar place - home.
“What about the church?” “What about our people?”
“What about my job?”
“We just went through bootcamp and church planting school!”
These questions came up. But as extreme as we are, we knew if God was in it…then so be it. We bagan to plan on what that would look like.
Then we did it. We moved. I was unsure, but we did it. We were both in agreement. In hindsight, no doubt in my mind God was too.
Jobs were scarce. The job market was not good at all at the time. The economy sucked like it does now. The line of work I was in didn’t do well in that part of the country, so I ended up working a manufacturing job and eventually working at a startup carwash business.
The carwash business was a hit. It was owned by a family who were amazing Christians and they loved both my wife and I. I love it, but on the inside I missed Colorado. I wanted to go back. Nothing was familiar. I was in the middle of nowhere in a town in northern Michigan where nothing but snow is on the ground for 8+ months of the year. I was unhappy with the job and the trajectory things were going. I had no idea what to do with what I felt and had no one to talk to about it. Correction; I didn’t want to talk to no one about it. Inside I was miserable, but then again, we had met some amazing people and made friends with a lot of them too. I was very compartmentalized to say the least.
At the carwash, we dealt a lot with IT Helpdesk on our software systems. I had a dedicated IT gal that would help me if I ever had issues. There were some nights I had to go in, because the system would crash and I had to prepare for business the next day. On those nights, I’d have to call her. What started with a little laughter over the phone, became toxic. That’s all it takes. All it takes is for one man or woman (depending who is reading this) to make you laugh when you are in a vulnerable spot and damn. She brought thrill to my mundane and miserable life. Lie. Nothing but a lie.
Men…do NOT fall for it. It doesn’t work. Seek help. Email me. Reach out to me if you are in this position. This leads to nowhere but a death trap. CUT IT OFF AND RUN!
What was a simple laugh between two dead people, became text messages to personal phones, naked photos back and forth, conversations, and had it went any longer…well…you can paint that picture.
My wife knew nothing about it. I hid it for a long time.
I knew how to charm my wife when I needed to and not show my real self. In fact, I had everyone fooled.
Even my church.
(To be continued…)